Since I am working on this style lately I will give you my take on these.
The first image doesn't work for me with the lighting as is. You need more contrast to it. My image is not the best either but you can get the idea of what I am saying.
The second is not that bad. Again more contrast and maybe a slightly different angle of view. Maybe not as extreme as my image here but again simular to this one.
Look forward to working with you soon. You have posted some great images, thanks and keep posting.